I owe her so much but give her so little; she tells me that she wouldn't be able to cope if we split up, but I keep thinking that our relationship is only surviving because she fears what I'd do if she broke up with me.
She is helping me through my second bout of depression of our 18 month relationship - I have worked out that I have been in the fog for about half our time together. I have had some of the best times of my life with her, even in my darkest days she has given me strength and made me smile.
After a whole day of moving house I broke down last night...after she said she wanted to take me out for 'Our Last Supper' at our favourite local Indian Restaurant. I cried because I would have loved to have taken her out - she deserved to be taken out. My dream is to take her to Rio De Janeiro for her birthday, that will be my moviation when I get out of bed for work tomrrow morning....
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